15 June 2015

OMG! Disaster!

The top 10 life emergencies and how to deal with them

OMG! Disaster!

If you're in the middle of a life emergency you've come to the right place...

1. "I think I might be pregnant"
* First things first, find out if you are - take a home pregnancy test.
* If it's negative. visit your local family planning clinic (find your nearest online at http://www.fpa.org.uk/finder/ ) and get some free contraceptive advice (and free contraception) to save this situation from happening again (until you definitely want it to that is).
* If it's positive. go to your local GP to have a confirmation test and find out your options. If this is the best news ever, congratulations! If it's not ideal right now and you want to find out more about having your options, go to www.mariestopes.org < http://www.mariestopes.org/ > .
* For independent, confidential advice on pregnancy and contraception visit www.brook.org < http://www.brook.org/ >  - you can ask them anything, they're brill!
* Finally, hard as it may be, if you can bring yourself to talk to a parent or guardian about what's happened, do it. They might be shocked, but they are almost always brilliant in the end.


2. "I think I've got an STD"
* Find out if you have - visit your local family planning centre (find your nearest online at http://www.fpa.org.uk/finder/ ) and they'll be able to give you a sexual health screening and all the advice you'll need on keeping safe in the sack. You can also get regular sexual health screenings here too, to make sure you don't spend you're time in bed wondering 'what if.?'

3. "I've been dumped"
* There's no easy solution to heart-break, but if you fancy a day under the duvet, eating jaffa cakes and watching repeats of 'Friends' - go for it.
* After a day though, get up, dry your tears and GO AND HAVE SOME FUN, if for no other reason than to show whoever this loser is who's dumped you that you have an ace life and don't need them...
* Spend time with friends or family, go shopping or go and do something you wouldn't normally do, help yourself remember that you're young, cool, free and er. single. And that can be the most fun, ever!
* Stay proud. No stalkerish texts, no public scenes, it won't get them back so why put yourself through it?
* Avoid rebound snogging to get over being dumped. Not fair on the other person, and as it doesn't work anyway.


4. "I've failed my exams"
* Find out if you can re-take - colleges and sixth forms allow you to re-take G.C.S.E.'s during your Year 12 and 13, BTEC courses are another option to A Levels and you can apply through UCAS clearing to still get a place on a university course.
* For school exams, or ones you can't re-take - go and chat to a teacher you trust about the exam. Teachers are there to help, they want you to pass next time and if they know that, even though it didn't go your way this time you really want it to next time, they'll do anything they can to help you.
* Find out about career options that don't involve a string of top A-Levels. Think about what your real talents are and pursue careers where you know you'll shine. Some of the most successful people we know have rubblish A-Levels and never went to Uni...


5. "I've broken the law"
* If you've knowingly broken the law or suspect someone else you know has, you need to speak to an adult you trust immediately. Whether that's your parent, an adult sibling, a teacher or a friend's parent, you need to tell someone and let them help you do the right thing.
* If the law has been broken you will need to report the incident to the police, whether you were directly involved in it or not. It's much better if you voluntarily go to talk to the police yourself. The longer you leave it without talking to someone about it, the more serious it could become for everyone involved.
* If you're not sure if you've broken the law or not, follow this link and work it out!


6. "Someone close to me has died"
* Dealing with the death of a close family member or friend is one of the toughest things you'll ever have to go through. Everyone deals with grief in different ways, so take your time and take it one day at a time, you don't need to rush back to school, college, social occasions etc. if you're not ready.
* There'll also probably be lots of other people grieving for this person as well, talk to someone else who knows what you're going through and perhaps share some stories about happy times and special memories you hold with the person who has passed away.
* You could create a memory box of photos, cards, messages and things you have that remind you of that person, an alternative is to plant something in your garden/ an outdoor space that can be dedicated to them.
* Winston's Wish are a UK charity helping young people deal with bereavement, visit www.winstonswish.org.uk < http://www.winstonswish.org.uk/ >  for independent information, help and support.


7. "My best friend hates me"
* If you've fallen out with your best mate you need to figure out why she/ he is mad and try to sort it out as soon as you can. It's not fun arguing with a bessie. Think about why they might be angry and whether you can understand why they're hurt.

* Ask if you can meet up and talk about it - generally it's not good to sort these things out in school if you think it'll turn into an argument. Public arguments are definitely not fun!

* When you meet up be calm, honest and apologetic, sometimes it's easier to say sorry for making them mad than it is to argue for days/ weeks about something until you even forget what you're arguing about. If he/ she really is your best friend, they'll want to make up too.

8. "I've got an eating disorder"
* If people around you are worried about your relationship with food, or you think you might have a problem yourself, you need to talk to someone. The good news is there are many people out there who can listen, advise and help you.

* Think of the adult you trust the most, whether that's one of your parents, an older sibling, a friend's parent, or a teacher at school. Tell them what's happening and that you've come to speak to them about it because you trust them. They'll be able to listen and help.

* If you don't want to speak to anyone you know, visit http://www.b-eat.co.uk - beat is a UK wide charity providing helplines, online support and a network of people to help you beat your eating disorder.

* Remember - eating disorders are serious problems on their own, but can also lead to other health issues, which may affect you long-term. So telling someone how you're feeling is really important.

9. "I don't have any friends"
* Making good friends isn't as easy as everyone makes it out to be, especially if you're shy. The best way to make friends is to join a club or hobby group where you'll meet people with a similar interest. Whether it's rock climbing, swimming, dance, scooter club or drama, not only will you be doing something you enjoy, or starting a new hobby, you'll have a common interest with the other people and something to start talking about. In school this works too, if there's clubs and activities in lunchtime or after school.

* If you're not a club or activity person, think about who in your class or out of school you'd like to be friends with. Perhaps ask to sit with them at lunch or registration (or after school if they don't go to your school) and find out what subjects they love or hate, or what hobbies they have. If they're nice they'll ask you about yourself and before you know it you'll be chatting away.

* There's a really good section about making friends on the Kidscape website - have a look here to see http://www.kidscape.org.uk/childrenteens/makingfriends/1makingfriends.shtml


10. "I'm in danger"
* If you're in some other kind of trouble that we haven't touched upon in 1-9 there's always a way out of whatever it is and always someone to talk to or help you.

·      For advice on drugs talk to Frank ( http://www.talktofrank.com/ ).
·      For free and confidential advice on sex, sexual health and contraception visit Brook ( http://www.brook.org.uk/ ).
·      For advice on how to deal with being bullied visit Kidscape ( http://www.kidscape.org.uk/index.shtml ).
·      For help and support with disability visit Action for Kids ( http://www.actionforkids.org < http://www.actionforkids.org/ > ).
·      For information and advice on coping with being a young carer go to Youngcarers.net ( http://www.youngcarers.net/ ).
·      For anything and everything contact Childline, either by visiting http://www.childline.org.uk < http://www.childline.org.uk/ >  or telephoning 0800 1111. Calls are free, confidential and the Childline crew on the other end of the phone are brilliant!

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